An inordinate amount of gyozas

January 23, 2022

You were sick today and your fever went up a whole degree higher compared to yesterday’s temperature check. I was worried. But I didn’t want to worry you by having to worry about me worrying, too. So I did my best to keep my cool.

I was worried not because I was worried about me getting sick. That wasn’t even a thought that would’ve occurred to me had you not mentioned it. I was worried because you were sick again after having just recovered and I was worried that this would make you more pranny. You were already feeling down in the dumps about a whole lot of other things and this really wasn’t helping. I wish I could’ve done a lot more to make you feel better, even just a little bit.

I would’ve wanted to make you ramen. I would’ve wanted to cook you some homemade gyoza. I would’ve wanted to have to explain to you why I had fried 70 gyozas instead of a reasonable amount, like five or ten or so. I would’ve wanted to brew you tea. I would’ve wanted to ask you which one you wanted — chamomile for sleep, peppermint for breathing better, vanilla rooibos for a little excitement. And after insisting on washing all the dishes so you could get ready for bed, I would’ve wanted to ask you what you felt like spacing out to. I could rent us a movie or I could regale you with my never-ending stories about dumb stuff that I had done when I was younger.

I would’ve just wanted to make you laugh and then maybe pass out beside you because frying seventy gyozas could take a lot out of a person. I would know, I’ve done that before. Not for anyone really, just for myself. But it would’ve been nice if I could’ve done that for you, too.

By the time you read this, you would have been completely recovered. But know that in whatever state you’re in, healthy or not, I’d still do all the things listed above in a heartbeat. For you, I will fry 70 or even 140 gyozas if you ask me to.